The No Jerk Rule

No Jerk Rule - Kick

We all know that some people fall into a certain category of person. These people are sore losers (or sore winners), and they generally try to hound you no matter how much you try to avoid them. They're always talking about themselves and never ask about you, or they insist on telling you how awesome they are. Instead of talking about themselves, they might just constantly critique your work, especially when you want their opinions the least.

These people have a name. That name is "jerk." More accurately, they might not be jerks, but their actions are often that of jerkiness. Whether they try to bring you down or are trying to bring themselves up, they are generally unpleasant to be around. Either way (or even if they reek of some other sort of personality disorder like just being a rude asshat), we're going to call them jerks for now and move forward.

So Monkey + Seal have a rule: it's called the "No Jerk Rule." We actually call it the "No A-hole Rule," but for pleasantry's sake, let's go with jerks.

Basically, we refuse to work with jerks. While it is a lot more difficult to start out following this rule when you're starting out, we've found that it's a great guiding principle for our business. If the jerk is a client, we'll politely and professionally end the relationship. If it's a collaborator, we'll politely and professionally leave the project. No matter how it works - no jerks.

We do realize that at times there are people who seem nice at first and turn into jerks as you begin to work with them. Also, you can be contractually obligated to work with people and you can't back out lest some sort of huge financial obligation. There are many circumstances, but there are ways that sometimes you can get stuck with jerks. How to deal with them? The Jerk Fee.

If you are working with a client who you know is going to be troublesome from the get-go, the best way to deal with them is to basically apply a Jerk Fee. Whatever that fee is, you want to make sure that it's enough for you to feel okay about dealing with this person. This is why for design work you should always limit the number of revisions your client gets for free. The jerks are going to be the one who will make you change a color, then change it back, then add some new text that will completely change the layout, then have you change it back to a new color and remove all the first changes...etc. etc. etc. By basically giving them a free proof or two, but then charging them for each revision, people usually limit their changes after that.

If you're working with a client who refuses to get you assets on time, start charging them a fee for every day late that they turn it in. Your friend of a friend not paying you for that CD cover that you delivered a month ago? Let them know that in your contract, you stipulated payment in full within 7 days of receipt and they you're charging them 10% per day, interest compounding, after each day thereafter.

If you couldn't tell, Monkey + Seal have found that contracts are our best friends. Even for little jobs for friends, signing contracts is important as you can legally bind these people to agree to your Jerk Fees. If they are going to make your life as an artist more difficult, you should be compensated for it, and by putting that in writing, it makes people generally a lot more civil and easier to work with.

Alternatively, if your boss is a jerk, we recommend that you start looking for a new job, ASAP. While there is a myth that everyone hates their boss, it is just that: a myth, so do your best to try and find good bosses. You can have really cool bosses (yes, they do exist!). We don't advise just quitting your job without a backup unless the abuse is too much to handle, and at that point, there are probably other recourses you can take like harassment suits or talking to HR.

The other option to quitting a toxic job is to start up your own business on the side. Want to quit your day job? Start the hustle. Find ways to sell your art. Write an e-book. Auction your paintings off on eBay. Get that portfolio together and start submitting it wherever you can. Figure out what skills you have that people will pay for and get out there and find a way to make other sources of income. Escape the jerkdom!

The one caveat to the "No Jerk Rule" is that you have to act like everyone else has this rule as well. You gotta make sure that you are acting professionally and with integrity as well. Be the artist that YOU would want to work with.

All in all, the reason we really want to encourage people to take up the "No Jerk Rule" is because when it really comes down with it, no one should have to put up with bad behavior. You're an awesome, amazing person, and you deserve much better.

How Distractions Can Save Your Life

We all get distracted while we're trying to do work - especially work that seems tedious or boring or that we aren't excited about. Instead of cleaning the studio (which might create a better environment for creating), we end up watching youtube videos or reading blogs. Instead of working on that painting we've been trying to finish for the last two months, we're on our phones playing Angry Birds or Words with Friends.

It happens to the best of us, and with smart phones and laptops, it's even easier to be lured away from our work. And if we're digital artists who are plugged into the net for important emails and looking for reference or using Skype or Gchat to communicate with clients or collaborators, there's always emails about specials, vacations, funny links to viral content, etc. etc. etc. How is someone supposed to get any work done?

The worst thing is that when we give in to our primal urges to watch the latest Gaga video, or whatever it is we're compelled to distract ourselves with, is that the entire time we're distracting ourselves we're also fighting the voice in our head that's saying "You're wasting time! Get back to work!" The same goes for many people who put in long hours to get their creativity done or entrepreneurs that are trying to get a side-business (or two) up and running. While we need breaks to stay sane, every time we decide to take a night off, or to ignore our emails for going on a date or hanging out with friends, we feel like we're failing ourselves a little bit since we don't have the dedication to keep our nose to the grindstone. Guilt and frustration at ourselves begins to well up, and we begin to not even enjoy the break anymore since we know "we should be working!"

In this way, we're not really even taking a break. If we're still thinking about that email that needs to be sent or that shirt that has to get printed, we're not taking a break, we're merely not doing work and raising our stress level at the same time.

Poo poo on this! While we're guilty of this as well (that's why we talk about it here!), we all need to get better at compartmentalizing the difference between work and play. However you do it, you have to make a break between work and non-work. Whether it's scheduling in breaks as you would an important meeting with a producer, or if it's scheduling the time that you have to do your creative work, you have to do it.

You see, if a break doesn't feel like a break, then it's really just a waste of your time. If you're not recharging and feeling good about yourself on a break, you're just distracting yourself from your distractions, so at that point you might as well just be working. But all work and no play makes people crazy, so take a break and enjoy it!

We have found that life is all about priorities. Priorities are different for everyone, but when we say "we don't have time," we're really just saying that we are not prioritizing it. If you say "I don't have time to take a break," are you really engaged every single second of every single hour with some activity that is more important than your own sanity? You can't delegate a task for ten minutes? You can't take five minutes on your bus ride to zone out and meditate? You can't waste three minutes on your lunch to watch a funny video, or tend to your digital crops?

Just as important as it is to prioritize creating, it is equally important to prioritize taking an actual, enjoyable, guilt-free break. So what do you do to rest and recharge?

Shutting Down the Heckler

Inside your head there is a voice. Where it came from isn't all that important, but it'll probably take on the voice of one of your greatest critics. Maybe your parents, maybe a teacher, someone perhaps who you thought was your friend but really isn't.

"You suck."

"You're doing it wrong."

"That totally didn't work."

Sound familiar? This butthole voice is what Seth Godin calls "The Heckler." While I think you should all go read Seth Godin's description here about The Heckler, we'll sum it for you in a sentence: "The Heckler is part of your primal, lizard brain that you can't ever really get rid of. If you fight, it will fight harder, and the only way to get rid of it is to disable it."

So, Monkey and Seal, how do you disable the Heckler? The Heckler is a big bully that takes pleasure in your resistance - it enjoys the fight, and is just waiting for you to tell it to shut up so you can yell louder. Using one simple phrase will take the wind out of the bastard's sails, making it weaker and quieter. That phrase is:

"So what?"

If you've ever been taunted, or teased, or a victim of bullying, the immediate, primal urge is to react against the insults. You refute the disparaging claim or you try and throw it back at the bully. However, as it is the nature of a bully, it will take pleasure in your obvious reaction and will continue on its bully ways of attacking you. However, it stops being fun for the bully when you don't react, or care.

Instead of "No, my painting doesn't suck, yours sucks!" it's "My painting sucks? So what?" Its the exact opposite reaction the Heckler needs to continue on the fight.

"That brushstroke doesn't work. So what?"

"I messed up in that last routine. So what?"

"I didn't win that competition. So what?"

Now we don't want you to turn into some self-effacing downer that's just all negative. By saying "So what?" the goal is not to get down about whatever deficiency (imaginary or real) that your inner Heckler is bringing up. The goal is to realize that whether the Heckler is right or wrong, it's not the end of the world.

The skies won't rain blood just because you missed a note in that last solo. The earth won't implode because you didn't render those hands enough. The sun won't die just because your proportions are off.

If we have the fortitude and imagination to dream, we also have the imagination to whip up illusions of grandeur where we become painfully inadequate compared to Everyone Else. However, even when we are at the height of our careers and a huge mistake could cost us everything, we still tend to overreact to mistakes and to exaggerate what Everyone Else thinks about us.

If you're an aircraft controller, the stakes are high. Planes could crash, people could die. If you're a painter, most likely you are not going to be put in a situation where your performance is a life or death situation. The Heckler is telling you that it's the end of the world, that your imperfection (perfection is overrated anyway, remember?) is a huge deal. It's not. You screwed up. So what? Learn from it and grow. There are no mistakes, just opportunities for growth.

The point of disabling the Heckler is not to stop criticism. The point of disabling the Heckler is taking the work-stopping, genius-interrupting, creativity-killing emotional sucker punch that comes with the taunts of the Heckler and taking the poison out of them. Criticism is good, it helps you grow, but if you take it personally and shut down, then all it's doing is getting in your way of living up to your true potential of making something magical and wonderful.

Perfection is Overrated (Enjoy the Ride)

We all (hopefully) are striving for perfection in our work (and if you aren't, what are you working for?). However, we think that perfection is overrated.

Often in the artist's journey, we are chasing after some sort of ideal. Perhaps it's the perfect translation from what's in your head to what's on paper/canvas/wood/the dance floor/etc. Perhaps it's worldwide fame and acclaim. Perhaps it's your own holy grail of technical perfection. Whatever it is, it's that elusive thing that we spend our lives chasing.

The thing to watch our for on this quest is the notion that we MUST find it. We often berate ourselves for not being perfect, for not achieving this impossibly high level of awesomeness. Every attempt feels like a failure and we end up crushing our own dreams because the elusive perfection is so far away. The key here is that if we are on this quest for perfection, we must want/desperately need to achieve it, but we have to realize that the road to perfection is what's important, not perfection itself.

You see, perfection itself is overrated. Once you achieve perfection, what are you going to do? You've crushed all competition, you have surpassed your rivals and mentors and instructors, nothing is ever new to you, you can't learn anything more. You just sit there alone at the top with nowhere to go but down. Not a very appealing prospect, if you ask us. What sounds more awesome is the notion of being close to perfection. You have competitors and rivals keeping you on your toes. You have to constantly stay on top of your game because other people are on top of theirs. You learn from your peers, and you look forward to finding something new and exciting in your craft. Sounds much more fun and interactive and amazing, right?

Now don't get us wrong - perfection is still something you want to strive for, but realize that it's something that you probably won't achieve in your lifetime. No one does. Take Michelangelo and DaVinci. These two genius masters of the Renaissance have had lasting effects on the world, and these two guys were alive over 500 years ago. However, they weren't perfect, but both strove for perfection and constantly worked and worked and worked at their craft so much that many would call them "perfect," even though they were not always happy with their own work. Michelangelo wasn't pleased with a tomb for the pope that he worked on for 40 years! The reason we regard these two so greatly is that while they were extremely gifted and talented and produced amazing works of art and engineering, they constantly strove for perfection. Additionally, just because they weren't perfect doesn't mean that their work wasn't amazing and awe-inspiring. You shouldn't knock your own work just because it is not perfect - it can still be amazingly mind-blowing - the secret is to embrace your creation for what it is, and the next time keep on striving for that perfect piece.

You see, oftentimes we forget in our hyper-competitive world that the trip is just as important as the destination, and in the journey of a creative, the trip is more important than the destination. If we must strive for perfection but never achieve it, you can either look at it as extremely depressing and you can give up now, or you can enjoy the neverending quest for perfection and enjoy the ride.

If you're in the creative field because you want to make money, get out. Whatever the field you're in, if you're in it just to make money, then why bother? The whole point is that you should be doing something that you enjoy and love, and you need to find joy in the pursuit of perfection, not perfection itself.

So go out there, try your best, and make something awesome today. Because just remember, while it might not be perfect, it doesn't have to be.

Let Your Freak Flag Fly - Be Yourself

Many people might give you unsolicited "advice" as to how to approach your work. Maybe your paintings are too dark and morbid, or that abstract painting looks like a bunch of paint splatters, or that you should take photos that are more commercial.

Getting criticism isn't a bad thing - it's getting unhelpful criticism (especially unsolicited criticism) that's a bad thing. Having someone help critique your work is awesome - we constantly critique each other's work probably daily, but we always ask for it, and we always ask what the other person is trying to achieve.

Asking what the other person is trying to achieve is always important before giving feedback. This allows you to tailor your feedback to the specific problem the other person is trying to achieve. If you are trying to paint a stylized character with goofy proportions, it doesn't help if the feedback is "Your proportions are off." Duh, that's what you were trying to do in the first place, right? However, if you're working on a photo-realistic painting of a friend and someone suggests that perhaps the left eye is a bit higher than where it should be, then you're getting helpful feedback.

But let's get back to bad feedback. Hopefully you don't have to deal with this, but if someone (especially someone whose opinion really matters to you, ie. mom, dad, partner, etc.) gives you feedback completely unsolicited and completely opposite of what you want to do and who you are, DO NOT LISTEN.

While they might mean well, do not listen to them. If you paint bears, and you love to paint bears, and bears are your favorite thing to paint, don't paint landscapes, even if you think you'll have a better chance to sell the painting. Even if you think you have a better chance at getting into a gallery. Especially if that someone told you not to paint bears, you had better frickin' keep painting bears.

If you don't enjoy what you paint, even if you're good at it, even if you become successful, you won't be happy. Monkey and Seal fought their Academy of Art classical realism training for years, and only just now are we really embracing what we love to do. Seal was told that her paintings are too saturated and look too much like animation background illustrations to be fine art. Bah! Monkey was told to paint more realistic, and to leave out the text or incorporate it more into the painting. Bah!

You have to love what you do, and to do that you have to do what you love. Whether you like painting demons or angels, landscapes or portraits, animal sex scenes or intricate church interiors, you have to paint what you like. If you're a dance who loves modern dancer, don't do ballet (unless you love ballet as well). If you're a MC, rap about what you want to rap about, not what you think will get you street cred. If you're a weirdo, be a weirdo. Everyone is weird to someone else. Just as you might be branded a weirdo for making your own paintbrushes out of your own hair, for you, that's normal and most importantly that's who YOU are. If you collect Coach bags, while you might think that everyone thinks you're normal, I bet you there are a good billion people or so who think you're nuts for spending so much on a single bag.

There is always going to be someone who thinks you're doing it wrong, but in reality, if you're happy, you're probably doing it right. So do what you love to do, and do it proudly, and everything else you want will fall in place after that.

Quest for Originality

For the next series of paintings, I was on the quest to find originality. What I found was that, originality was elusive. The more I chased after it, the more I was painting the same way, making the same marks that I have always done, painting the same subjects again and again. When I searched for originality and creativity purposefully with intention, I peered over the edge and it seemed that my brain was completely empty.

When I stopped searching, when I decided "not to care," originality came to me. Maybe, originality can only be present if it is unplanned and spontaneous, when parts of your critical attention is turned off. It seemed like such a simple concept so I decided to try it. What I found is that although you cannot force originality, you can do certain things in your everyday life to encourage more moments of spontaneity and clarity. You can create a space and simulate processes that will give you a higher percentage of finding originality.

The formula for originality

Decide not to care. I'm not talking about not caring about your art of your painting, but not caring about how it will turn out, or how it will be received, how you should be painting. If we went to a formal art school, there were certain ways in which we were taught how to paint or approach the canvas. Or even if we were self-taught, there was a pattern which worked for you and you kept doing. I'm telling you to forget the rules.

1. Feed your artist spirit with new experiences - when we are focused on our craft, making a painting, or writing a novel, we are reaching into the countless of brain connections we have made in the past. We reach towards that one color we saw on the cover of national geographic, or the phrasing we've read by our favorite authors, etc. We have these bus routes/train tracks in our brains and if we're limited on how many images we filed away, we'll make the same connections again and again. We'll paint the same kind of tree again and again, because that's the one we know. That's the one that becomes comfortable. But what if you added an 3-inch thick encyclopedia of different types of trees, from the tropics of Indonesia to the Black Forest in Europe? You'll now have built a more interesting array to pull images from. And what if, on top of that, you decided to add an encyclopedia of insects? You now can paint insect-like trees. When feeding your inner artists, make sure to pull from both categories of things that interest you, that you are comfortable with, as well as subjects you know nothing about and what terrifies you.


2. Distract your brain - if our brains are making the same connections again and again. Painting and writing the same things, you need to turn off that part of your brain. Listen to music and paint to the harmony. Write you dialogue script as if it were a baking recipe. Doodle without intention - just let the pen drift in all sorts of direction without reigning them in. Find activities in which you tune out. I get some of my best ideas when I am having tea break, when I'm jogging, or in the shower. Because during those activities, I am not completely focused on art, I am just living.

3. The opposite to the above, pay attention ,very close attention to the minute and mundane - eavesdrop on that boring conversation on the bus, trace the cracks on the sidewalk with your footsteps, notice that speckled texture on your ice cream, or the swirly pattern in your coffee cup. These all can be part of some new alien landscape.

Japanese architecture can become a mechanical jellyfish.

4. Changing your muscle memory - our brains are connected to our hands, even when we doodle, we tend to create the same shapes and patterns without knowing. We've ingrained them to our muscle memory. To change it, or train your muscles to do things differently, you've got to give it a handicap. Doodle with the opposite hand. If you're a right hander, draw with your left. Tie your fingers together so you can only use two. Use a brush the size of your broom. You'll definitely make marks you've never done before.

I was able to "find" this robot by making random marks with my left hand on paper first.

Now, when you look down at what you've drawn, you'll probably find marks that makes little sense or shapes that look "childish or foreign" because you've never drawn this way before. To make sense of it all. To finally rope in originality, we've got to turn your usual brain back on. We'll need that pattern-finding, sensible, methodical you to make sense of all this randomness. You've got to find the pattern within the chaos.

Originality can't always be summoned by our will. It is often "process-depedent," so in order to find it you'll have to keep reinventing your creative process.

The Formula for Making Miracles

So today we've decided to provide you with the formula for making miracles happen. These aren't the type of miracles that happen overnight (well, they can sometime), nor are they the "walk on water/resurrect the dead" type of miracle. The miracles we're talking about are the kind that change your life without you even knowing it. It's the book deal you've always wanted, or the opportunity to attend art school, or the "perfect job" of your dreams. It's the mural you've always wanted to be asked to paint, or the opportunity to study under a premier choreographer, the vision of the "future you" that you know may be possible, if you just believe and reach out.

One last caveat before we reveal all: the formula asks for a lot of hard work and time, so if you're not on board with busting your bootie for your dreams, either jump ship now and embrace the fact that you are choosing to ignore your inner artist, or brace yourself, strap in, and roll up your sleeves and get ready for a paradigm shift.

So the formula for making miracles happen is deceptively simple, yet can be frustratingly difficult.

The big (not so) secret is: D+W+F=O

While that probably makes no sense to you, let's break it down now, shall we?

The D is for DREAM. In movies, when it's bases loaded, down by 3, bottom of the 9th, 2 outs, you know that the batter isn't just thinking "hmm, I hope I'll hit the ball today." You know they are thinking about hitting that game-winning, last minute home run that'll make them the hero. If the batter just aims lower and goes only for a single, most likely this is not enough to pull all your runners into house base and someone on your team will get an out, and your team would be done. In this situation, you have to steel your resolve. Despite the real fear and the overwhelming doubts, you have to commit to dream big (and be ready to make it happen) or you go home with regrets. (It is not enough, to say, "well maybe . . . I would like this . . . it'd be nice" you have to think "Yes! I want it! All the way to the very ends")

Just as the batter is forced to dream big, so must you. Whatever your dream is, make sure you have it stuck in your mind and have it be clear about what you want. So take a step back and think about what sort of miracle you want. Would it be a miracle to own your own successful business that pays you $35k a year? Would it be a miracle to get a lead role in a feature film directed by David Lynch? Would it be a miracle to pay off all your student loans by selling hand-carved wooden figures? Whatever your dream is, be specific and make sure its a dream worth fighting for.

Your dream has to be worth fighting for, because the next part of the formula is going to need some fighting for. W is for Work. Like we said earlier, this isn't the resurrection-type of miracle. We're talking about real, achievable goals being met, and if you really want them to happen, you've gotta work for it. Whatever it is, whether creative or not, if you want the world to help you out, you have got to help yourself first.

Doing the work is not easy, but it is integral into getting what you want. Even if you're a certified genius, you'll still need to work hard if you want to move beyond your given talents. But chances are, like us, you aren't a genius, even if others might think you are. We would wager you probably work harder than anyone else, but you just keep that fact hidden. So given that you aren't a genius, but a normal human being that is talented and amazing, you're still going to have to put in lots of work. Ever heard of the 10,000 hour rule? So your miracle is probably going to need a bit of work, but it'll come. It's just a matter of doing the leg work. Just as you can't win the lottery without ever buying a ticket, you can't make or sell a painting without ever picking up some paint. Keep doing and keep putting yourself out there.

So you're doing the work, and it's long, and maybe it's hard, and maybe you're starting to think "why isn't this working?" If you think "this isn't working," it probably isn't. If you think that it does, it does. If you think that it's hard, it probably begins to be. If you think it's challenging, but doable and it gets easier, it probably does too. Start to get the pattern? The next part in the formula is F for Faith. This is the hardest concept to explain.

Whatever your thoughts are on religion or higher beings or the Universe, one thing that you absolutely, positively, must believe in is yourself and believe that if you take a step forward, the universe takes two for you. Help yourself and people around you can't help but lend their hands to you. You have the power to be proactive and to make whatever situation you are in, better. Trust me, there is always something that can be done that will get you closer to your dreams. And when you are working towards that, trust that whatever you are doing, is working. These miracles are the type that YOU manifest. You have to believe that you can accomplish your goal, and that before you know it, you are living your dreams. Often, most people don't achieve their goals because they give up too soon. They give up at the very moment that they should be leaning into it. The hard work didn't pay off fast enough for them, so they forsake everything and abandon their dreams.

Now people often think superstars in whatever field just explode out of no where. While this might be true a fraction of the time, often times it's not. In the art world, this misperception happens really, really often. You'll suddenly see some artist having solo show after solo show all over the world, and you'll think to yourself "damn, that artist is lucky, they just came out of nowhere." In reality, most of these artist were operating under the mainstream's radar for YEARS before they explode out into the mainstream press. Think about how long David Choe was hitting the streets before he became the world-wide gallery superstar that he is now. Like we said, 10,000 hours is about right if you're hoping to be the best at what you do.

So wait until you start hitting close to the 10,000 hours before you really decide to quit. If you want something like a free cheeseburger, give it a few days. Either way, depending on how large your dream is, the time frame that you'll have to keep believing in yourself despite all adversity will scale accordingly. After all, no one becomes the President of the United States overnight.

So, if you've taken the D+W+F, you'll see your miracles start to happen with the O, cuz that stands for Opportunity. After all that sweat (and maybe some blood and tears), you'll find that doors will start opening. Connections will suddenly become clear, investments you've started years ago will start to bear fruit, your work will be better than ever, you'll be better at hustling for your art. It'll be simple for you now, and you'll wonder about why you thought it was so hard in the beginning. But here is the hard-to-digest truth: It has always been easy if you believe it can be.

Think back, has any "coincidence" or "miracles" happened to you in the past? I know Monkey and Seal met a lot of awesome friends that seem to be in direct alignment to their dreams. We have also had many opportunities for gallery shows, freelance projects, and lasting friendships this way. So start talking about your dreams, take your Dreams and start going for them, put in the hard Work, and have Faith in yourself and believe that it's working and you'll start to see the Opportunities flow like miracles.